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Category: Postnatal depression

Feeling Depressed And Have No Support

Navigating Depression Alone: Finding Strength in Solitude

Depression is a formidable opponent that can cast a dark shadow over every aspect of life. The weight of despair and hopelessness can be particularly challenging when one feels isolated and lacking in support. In a world that often emphasizes the importance of connections, finding oneself in the depths of depression without a support system can be an incredibly isolating experience. However, it’s essential to recognize that even in solitude, there are ways to navigate the turbulent waters of depression and emerge stronger on the other side.

The Weight of Solitude

Depression is a complex and multifaceted mental health condition that can manifest in various ways. For those grappling with depression without a support system, the burden can feel even heavier. The absence of a strong support network can exacerbate feelings of loneliness, leading to a sense of isolation that permeates every aspect of life.

The Consequences of Isolation

Isolation and depression often form a vicious cycle, each exacerbating the other. When one is unable to share their struggles with others, it becomes challenging to break free from the clutches of despair. The absence of a support system can lead to a lack of motivation, self-doubt, and a sense of helplessness.

Coping Strategies

While navigating depression without support can be an arduous journey, there are coping strategies that individuals can employ to manage their mental health effectively:

  1. Self-Reflection: Take time for introspection and self-reflection. Understanding the root causes of depression can be a crucial step toward healing. Journaling or engaging in activities that encourage self-awareness can be helpful.
  2. Professional Help: Seek the assistance of mental health professionals. Therapists, counselors, and psychiatrists are trained to provide support and guidance. Online therapy platforms offer accessible options for those without immediate local resources.
  3. Establishing Routine: Creating a daily routine can provide a sense of structure and stability. Simple tasks, such as setting small goals or maintaining a regular sleep schedule, can contribute to a more positive mindset.
  4. Engaging in Creative Outlets: Expressing oneself through creative outlets, such as writing, art, or music, can be therapeutic. These activities offer a means of self-expression and can serve as a constructive outlet for emotions.
  5. Physical Activity: Incorporating regular physical activity into daily life has been shown to have positive effects on mental health. Whether it’s a short walk, yoga, or more intense exercise, movement can boost mood and alleviate symptoms of depression.

Building a Support System

While it may seem daunting, it is possible to cultivate a support system, even in the absence of close friends or family. Consider the following approaches:

  1. Online Communities: The internet provides a wealth of supportive communities where individuals can connect with others facing similar challenges. Forums, social media groups, and chat platforms can offer a sense of belonging.
  2. Supportive Helplines: Numerous helplines are available for individuals experiencing depression or emotional distress. Trained professionals are ready to provide a listening ear and offer support.
  3. Volunteering: Engaging in volunteer work can create opportunities to meet new people and build connections. Helping others can also foster a sense of purpose and fulfillment.

Further Reading Other People’s Stories


Depression can be a formidable foe, especially when faced alone. However, it’s important to recognize that healing is a journey that can be undertaken, even without a traditional support system. By employing coping strategies, seeking professional help, and actively building connections, individuals can find strength within themselves and gradually overcome the challenges of depression. Remember, reaching out for support is a sign of resilience, and it’s never too late to start the journey towards healing.

I also believe everyone experiences depression at some point in their lives. Depression, a pervasive and complex mental health condition, does not discriminate and knows no boundaries. It transcends age, gender, race, and socio-economic status, affecting individuals from all walks of life. It’s an invisible battle that can silently permeate the lives of anyone, regardless of outward appearances or apparent success. In its grasp, people may experience a profound sense of emptiness, hopelessness, and isolation, emphasizing that the impact of depression is not confined by societal norms or personal achievements. Recognizing the universality of this struggle underscores the importance of fostering empathy, understanding, and accessible mental health support for all those grappling with the challenges of depression.

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As someone who has suffered from clinical depression for many years, I do have my dark moments but always find a way of pulling through. I won’t say I sleep all day (a) because I can’t as I have obligations like running a business and also (b) being a carer, and most importantly I am determined that my depression will not get the better of me.

But things do get to me and there are moments when I physically have meltdowns and cry. I have tried reaching out in the past to my close network and they were shocked at what I said, promised to come back to me, and swept what I said under the carpet.

I guess people cannot handle other people’s problems especially if they have problems of their own.

Yes, there are support organizations out there but none of them can resolve your issues only give sound advice. For me personally, I can find all the resources in the world but none of them will resolve my problems. I know what the root cause of my depression is and until it is resolved my depression will not go away.

I try my hardest each day to stay positive and always try to keep myself busy. I avoid alcohol and drugs other than what I am prescribed. I do not smoke, although I have been contemplating vaping. I am not sure I should go down this route, to be honest. I have renewed my faith. I have noticed a little change since I started praying.

Somedays things become overwhelming to the point I shut off completely. Today was one of those days when I had a complete meltdown and started bawling my eyes. Presently I am feeling very low but hope and pray tomorrow will be a better day.

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In the face of inevitable challenges, maintaining a positive outlook becomes a powerful catalyst for resilience and personal growth. Embracing a positive mindset involves viewing obstacles not as insurmountable roadblocks, but as opportunities for learning and self-discovery.

#depression #clinicaldepression #mentalhealth #mentalheathsupport #mensmentalhealth #veteransmentalhealth #veteranssupport #ptsd #bipolar #selfhelptherapy #meditation #journaling


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Depression, Self-Harm, and Hygiene


This article is of a sensitive nature it may have trigger words, relating to self-harm.

The Complex Relationship Between Severe Depression, Self-Harm, and Personal Hygiene

Depression is a pervasive and often debilitating mental health condition that affects millions of people worldwide. It can manifest in various ways, from feelings of sadness and hopelessness to physical symptoms like changes in sleep and appetite. In some cases, individuals with severe depression may engage in self-harming behaviors, while others may struggle with personal hygiene. However, openly admitting to these struggles can be a complex and deeply personal process.

The Silence of Self-Harm

Self-harm is a distressing coping mechanism for some individuals with severe depression. These acts can range from cutting and burning to hitting oneself, and they are often driven by a desire to release emotional pain or regain a sense of control over overwhelming feelings. However, self-harm is typically a highly secretive behavior, and individuals who engage in it are often reluctant to openly admit their actions.

  1. Stigma and Shame: The stigma associated with self-harm can be a significant barrier to open communication. People may fear judgment, alienation, or misunderstanding from their friends, family, and society at large. The shame and guilt associated with self-harm can make it difficult for individuals to discuss their experiences.
  2. Fear of Consequences: People who self-harm may also fear potential consequences, such as psychiatric hospitalization or intervention by mental health professionals. This fear can further deter them from openly admitting to self-harming behaviors.
  3. Coping Mechanism: For some, self-harm serves as a way to cope with intense emotional pain. Opening up about self-harm can be complicated, as individuals may not have found healthier alternatives or may be afraid of losing their coping mechanism.

The Neglect of Personal Hygiene

Severe depression can manifest in various ways, including the neglect of personal hygiene. People who are deeply affected by depression may struggle with daily self-care routines, such as showering, grooming, and maintaining a clean living space.

  1. Apathy and Fatigue: Depression often saps individuals of their energy and motivation, making even basic self-care tasks feel like monumental challenges. The apathy and exhaustion associated with depression can lead to a neglect of personal hygiene.
  2. Self-Isolation: Depression can also cause individuals to withdraw from social interactions and isolate themselves. When people are no longer engaging with others regularly, they may be less inclined to maintain their personal hygiene.
  3. Cognitive Impairment: Depression can impair cognitive functions, making it difficult for individuals to focus on daily tasks, including personal hygiene. This can lead to feelings of guilt and self-loathing, further perpetuating the cycle of depression.

Breaking the Silence and Providing Support

Openly admitting to self-harm or personal hygiene struggles can be difficult, but it is a crucial step toward seeking help and support. The silence surrounding these issues only perpetuates the cycle of suffering. It’s important for friends, family, and loved ones to create a safe and non-judgmental environment in which individuals with severe depression feel comfortable discussing their struggles.

  1. Encouraging Communication: People with depression should be encouraged to speak openly about their experiences, without fear of judgment or consequences. Creating an atmosphere of trust and understanding is essential.
  2. Seeking Professional Help: For individuals who engage in self-harm or struggle with personal hygiene due to severe depression, seeking professional help is paramount. Mental health professionals can offer effective treatments and coping strategies.
  3. Supporting Self-Care: Friends and family can play a role in supporting individuals’ self-care routines. Encouraging small steps, such as showering or grooming, can be incredibly helpful for those struggling with personal hygiene.

Do people tell the truth about self-harming to a PIP assessor or admit that their personal hygiene is bad?

It’s essential to understand that individuals with mental health challenges, including self-harm or personal hygiene difficulties, may face significant barriers when discussing these issues with assessors or healthcare providers.

Here are some key factors that can influence whether individuals disclose self-harm or hygiene issues during assessments:

  1. Trust and Rapport: The level of trust and rapport between the assessor and the individual can impact their willingness to disclose personal struggles. If there’s a strong, trusting relationship, the individual may be more open about their experiences.
  2. Fear of Consequences: Individuals may fear that admitting to self-harm or poor personal hygiene could lead to negative consequences, such as psychiatric hospitalization or reduced disability benefits. This fear can lead to withholding information.
  3. Stigma and Shame: The stigma and shame associated with self-harm and poor personal hygiene can make it difficult for individuals to openly discuss these issues. They may worry about judgment or societal misunderstanding. A person may feel embarrassed to open up and be judged.
  4. Coping Mechanisms: Self-harm can serve as a coping mechanism for some individuals, and discussing it openly may be challenging because they haven’t found healthier alternatives or are afraid of losing their coping strategy. A person may not wish to have intrusive thoughts and may try to shut out negative emotions.
  5. Personal Readiness: Some individuals may not be ready to discuss these issues with an assessor or healthcare provider. It can take time and a supportive environment for them to feel comfortable opening up.

It’s crucial for assessors and healthcare providers to create a safe, nonjudgmental, and empathetic atmosphere during assessments. This helps individuals feel more comfortable sharing their experiences and struggles. Such disclosure is often a positive step toward obtaining the necessary support and treatment.

Training PIP Assessors: A Cautionary Approach to Inquiring About Self-Harm and Mental Health

The Personal Independence Payment (PIP) assessment process is a critical component of supporting individuals with disabilities and mental health challenges. When assessing a person’s eligibility for PIP, it is crucial that assessors are well-trained and sensitive to the complex issues surrounding mental health. In particular, the topic of self-harm requires a cautious approach to ensure the well-being of the claimant.

The Need for Sensitivity

Self-harm is a highly sensitive and potentially triggering topic, and inquiring about it during a PIP assessment must be approached with caution. One concern is that asking direct questions about self-harm can inadvertently “plant a seed” in someone’s mind, potentially encouraging harmful behaviors. Therefore, PIP assessors must receive specific training to handle these discussions appropriately. When a claimant states they are uncomfortable with the line of questioning the assessor should not be relentlessly persistent by saying they have to ask these questions. Any assessor that causes distress should be reported.

Using a Scale of 1-10

To assess a claimant’s mental health without making them feel uncomfortable or triggered, PIP assessors can utilize a scale of 1-10. This approach allows for a more nuanced understanding of the claimant’s mental well-being without explicitly asking about self-harm. The scale can be used in a manner similar to the following:

  1. Low mood: Assessors can start by asking individuals to rate their mood on a scale from 1 to 10, with 1 being extremely low and 10 being the highest mood possible. This provides insight into the individual’s emotional state.
  2. Anxiety: A similar approach can be applied to anxiety levels, with a scale ranging from 1 (extremely anxious) to 10 (completely calm).
  3. Coping: Assessors can inquire about how individuals cope with challenging emotions, stress, or daily life. Using the scale, the claimant can describe their coping mechanisms without the need for explicit self-harm questions.
  4. Access to Support: Assessors can ask claimants to rate the level of support they have access to for their mental health, allowing for an assessment of the claimant’s support network without directly discussing self-harm.
  5. Daily Functioning: Inquire about the individual’s ability to perform daily activities and self-care, utilizing a scale to understand their functioning without explicitly mentioning personal hygiene neglect.

A Cautionary Approach

While using a scale of 1-10 provides a subtler way to gauge mental health and related challenges, it is essential that assessors receive comprehensive training in handling sensitive topics with care. Assessors should be encouraged to listen actively, practice empathy, and create a nonjudgmental environment in which claimants feel safe to discuss their struggles. They should also be equipped with the knowledge of available mental health resources and support services to connect claimants with appropriate help if needed.

If you or someone you know is experiencing a crisis or immediate danger due to self-harm, it is essential to seek emergency help or contact a crisis hotline.


Depression is a complex and multifaceted mental health condition, and its impact on self-harm and personal hygiene is a reflection of its profound influence. While discussing these issues openly can be challenging, it is a critical step toward recovery and healing. Understanding the underlying factors contributing to self-harm and personal hygiene neglect and offering support and empathy are essential in helping individuals with severe depression on their journey toward improved mental health. Breaking the silence surrounding these issues is a step toward reducing the stigma and promoting a more compassionate society for those who suffer from depression.

Training PIP assessors to approach the assessment process with caution and sensitivity is paramount when discussing issues related to mental health, including self-harm.

Utilizing a scale of 1-10 offers a more discreet way to assess a claimant’s mental well-being without directly inquiring about self-harm or personal hygiene challenges. By fostering an environment of trust and empathy, PIP assessors can better understand the needs of individuals and ensure that they receive the support and assistance necessary to improve their quality of life and overall well-being.

#depression #clinicaldepression #mentalhealth #selfharm #suicide #stigma #shame #fear #trust #copyingmechanism #cognitiveimpairment #pip #personalindependancepayments #dwp #personalrediness #judgement #consequences #selfisolation #selfcare #intrusivethoughts


If you have had an unpleasant experience with ‘Personal Independence Payments’ (PIP) we want to hear from you. We won’t publish your name if you do not want us to. We want to build a database of horror stories to help reform the system.


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We are in the process of building our own directory of A-Z illnesses and disabilities. If you happen to land on this page we encourage you to visit the NHS website about the topic in our category.

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Sharing your expertise and experiences on this platform can have a profound impact in several ways:

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