Category: Invisible Disabilities (Page 1 of 2)

Panic Attacks vs Anxiety Attacks

The Difference Between Anxiety Attack Vs. Panic Attack.

As most of my readers are aware I suffer from OCD and Anxiety. I have suffered for over 35 years. With this in mind, I have decided to look into alternative therapy (hypnosis) to try and help myself and people like me.

Since the beginning of lockdown 2020, I have not ventured out of my home. All grocery is delivered and the nearest interaction I have with humans physically is when I have to meet and greet couriers or workmen and that suits me fine. I am the happiest and at home in my own environment.

I conduct all my business online and do not need to have face-to-face meetings.

However, this is more complicated and easier said than done. My friends are understanding and are happy to give me the space I need but my family on the other hand is another matter.

First off, someone said to me towards the beginning part of this year, that it was unhealthy of me to stay home 24/7 and that I should go up the road for 10 minutes each day.

I used to train ‘Muay Thai Kickboxing‘ and used to spend an hour at home exercising using DVDs before hitting the gym, so if I wanted to have any exercise I could in the comfort of my home without having to take the mindless waste of time walks as what was suggested. Besides standing outside waiting for delivery drivers gives me all the fresh air I need.

My time is better spent working and learning rather than walking up the road for no reason, I get my ten minutes each day waiting for the couriers as I cannot sprint down the stairs like I used to prior to having a vicious attack on my knee which left me unable to walk very far or down the stairs as easily as I used to be able to do.

However my extended family are the least bit interested in my explanations and are narrow-minded and simply think I am making excuses, how little do they know about my health or my life for that matter.

The other suggestion at the beginning part of this year was that once lockdown was lifted we should all meet up and go to dinner. I explained I have not had the vaccine jabs without going into any details about why I had not and cannot have the vaccine.

The response was if not for myself how about protecting the population to which I replied about herd immunity.

Yet the real reason why I cannot have the vaccines is that I have a PEG Allergy and cannot risk my health. I suffer from breathing difficulties from injectable steroids and penicillin as well as having severe allergic reactions to certain products and food. (This is all documented on my medical records) https://marketingagency.cymrumarketing.com/2021/03/19/polyethylene-glycol-peg-allergy-as-a-cause-of-anaphylaxis/

So because of this conversation, it then went on the grapevine that I do not go out, which has raised alarm bells amongst my closest family members.

Most do not bother with me and only talk to me at Christmas (small talk) yet they have my well-being at heart and concern themselves about my health, ironically, and think it is right to be judgemental of my actions.

Just because I have OCD does not make me insane, I am still in control of my faculties and can decide what is good for me and what is not. If I can write this post I am certainly an abled body person, just because my brain works differently does not make me less of a person or pitied upon.

I do not go out for a few reasons:

  1. I do not want to risk catching Covid as I am more susceptible of contracting it without being vaccinated.
  2. I have developed Social Anxiety and simply do not want to interact physically with other people.
  3. My OCD has got worse because I am more paranoid about germ contamination and have dedicated my life to beating this disease by researching neuroplasticity and hypnosis. I have already completed one course and will document my findings on www.ocd.cymru which I happen to own.
  4. I run a business I do not have spare time off to take off work, taking time off work means I have to pay someone to do my job. Since Lockdown I lost a lot of business so I am now trying to get back on my feet again. I have survived unlike businesses like Debenhams, Top Shop etc, so I am fortuante I have got a business.

None of this is taken into consideration or matters to my family (extended or otherwise) I feel my disability because it is invisible people make the assumptions that it is not real and they get on the superior high horse casting judgment.

Therefore in anticipation of what is about to transpire in the next week, I have been put on the spot and feel this is a test to see if I am simply making things up, I PREDICT I may have a PANIC ATTACK, seeing as I have ANXIETY ISSUES simply thinking about it.

I am so desperately trying to not work myself up as the day draws near.

So although I feel that some of my family means well in a certain capacity, because they do not know the full picture of my circumstances and some even live abroad and only see me every once in a while they do not fully comprehend my life, my health, or my work and simply do not understand.

I had one family member in South America asked when I was going to visit. The trip is not a taxi cab away and I have a business to run and the response I had was “so you can’t afford to come over then?” ……..automatically judging me.

In my defense, I cannot afford to catch Covid, my business is my baby and I will not let anything happen to it.

The sheer thought of going into the city and meeting my family member, mingling around strangers that may or may not be carrying the virus is causing me a great deal of anxiety and distress and this is in the UK never mind in some foreign country.

If I live to tell the tale unless and unless a miracle happens, Covid is eradicated, my Social Anxiety and OCD subsides, you will not see me venturing out again for a very long time after this unless I am cured of my disabilities and the virus has gone.

Anxiety vs Panic.

The terms anxiety attack vs. panic attack are often used interchangeably, but they have two they have very different meanings.

Anxiety is a prolonged build-up of worry but a panic attack is sudden. Whilst both have similar symptoms, there are definite distinctive differences between the two and the length of time one suffers. They also may differ in how they are triggered, and how they are treated.

Although there are similarities between the two, we need to fully comprehend the difference, as well, such as analyze risk factors, physical symptoms, and how to treat an attack, so that you can accurately document symptoms and problems to your doctor.

Both conditions are treated differently, so it is important to diagnose whether you are having anxiety attacks or panic attacks.

Early Signs and Symptoms

One of the main differences between anxiety attacks vs. panic attacks is how they start.

An anxiety attack usually has a gradual or prolonged onset. Just as I am experiencing now the simple thought of seeing one of my family members is causing me great anxiety and distress.

If I have not hugged or touched my daughter for the last 10 years imagine having to physically interact with a close relative in the midst of the Covid Pandemic, without offending them.

Other symptoms of anxiety usually precede it. It is also usually caused by a specific situation that can be narrowed down as the cause of the anxiety attack.

However, panic attacks are not obvious and come on spontaneously. They have an immediate onset, usually out of the blue, with no gradual build-up.

These types of attacks can come on without warning, regardless of the situation going on around you. Usually, it is a trigger to a response. Similarly, if I had a call out of the blue that I had to go out of my comfort zone I would most probably have a panic attack.

Sometimes an anxiety attack may turn into a panic attack especially if there has been a gradual build-up as in my case. The body is already in defense mode and is simply waiting for a trigger.

Symptoms

There are some similarities in the symptoms between anxiety attack vs. panic attack. While the physical symptoms are remarkably similar, they can vary in intensified intrusive thoughts and feelings between the two types of attacks. Anxiety attacks come with more prolonged thought than panic attacks which are sudden.

Anxiety Attack

Anxieties are gradual feelings of apprehension or worry, distress, restlessness, or fear. These symptoms usually start before the actual attack and persist long after the attack is over.

Panic Attack

Panic attacks are sudden, you may have similar symptoms as an anxiety attack but these symptoms are more intensified. With a panic attack, you may feel you are gasping for air or feel light-headed and want to be sick or you may experience a debilitating fear and a feeling of being afraid of losing control and everything is caving in around you. You may even have physical symptoms of the attack that may make you feel as though you are about to die.

Panic attacks also tend to come with a feeling of detachment from the world around you, called derealization, or detachment from yourself, called depersonalization. A panic attack may cause you to distance yourself from everything and everyone.

Physical Symptoms Of Both

The physical symptoms of anxiety attack vs. panic attack are the same. The difference here is in the intensity. One study found that anxiety attacks in which a specific situation or stimuli perpetuated the attack held stronger, more intense physical symptoms than panic attacks that came on out of the blue.

The most common physical symptoms of anxiety and panic attacks are:

  • Heart Racing/Palpitations
  • Feeling Faint, Dizziness/lightheadedness
  • Feeling Sick, Nausea
  • Tightness of the Chest and Chest pain
  • Feeling Hot and Sweating
  • Gasping for Air, Shortness of breath

Other symptoms that may occur with anxiety and panic attacks include:

  • Finding it hard to swallow, tightness in the throat, feeling as though you are choking
  • Uncontrolable Shuddering and Trembling or Shaking
  • Pins and Needles, Numbness or tingling
  • A headache with an onset of a Migraine

Physical symptoms can be similar with both anxiety or panic attacks in equal measure. However, the symptoms could be more intense and last longer with anxiety attacks, because they are situational. If the situation persists, the attack could last quite some time.

Differences In Duration

With Anxiety, the duration can be days, weeks, or months and there are distinct differences between anxiety attacks vs. panic attacks. A panic attack is sudden and comes on out of the blue and lasts only about an average of ten minutes, symptoms quickly dissipate after the attack is over.

With anxiety, the attack is likely to last until the situation changes, or you are removed from the situation. Symptoms of the anxiety attack, such as restlessness, worry, and distress, could last for some time after the anxiety attack is over.

Triggers

Anxiety is the manifestation of your negative thoughts that fester in your mind. There are also differences in triggers between anxiety attacks vs. panic attacks. The exact causes or triggers of panic attacks depend on what you fear most and what is worrying you. They are sudden and may start with no discernable cause. It could be stage fright or being forced into an uncomfortable situation out of your comfort zone.

Anything can trigger a panic attack based on your fears. It is sometimes hard to determine the cause of panic attacks, although people who have certain fears and worry about certain situations may experience panic attacks when their worries start to materialize.

With anxiety attacks, the triggers depend on the situation someone is in. People with extreme social disconnection disorders may have an anxiety attack when faced with a crowd of people.

Someone who is afraid of spiders may freak out if they see one and will not go back into a room until the spider has gone. People who have a phobia of closed spaces might have an anxiety attack in a small elevator. People afraid of needs may refuse to have a vaccine. Someone who has dental anxiety might have an anxiety attack at the dentist.

People cope with anxiety and fears in different ways. Some smoke, cigarette, drink alcohol, or take prescribed or recreational drugs. So use sex as a way of release and maybe promiscuous.

There are many possible triggers for anxiety attacks. It depends on the person’s tolerance threshold of their fears. Different people have different fears, phobias, and levels of comfort with different situations. The things that trigger one person may be very different from the things that may trigger someone else.

Risk Factors For Both

It is not entirely known what causes anxiety and panic attacks. However fear is a contributing factor. The risk factors of anxiety attack vs. panic attack are the same. If you have these risk factors, you are more likely to have anxiety attacks or panic attacks. Some common denominators have been noted over time in various studies as follows:

  • Trauma
  • Shock
  • Distress
  • Stress
  • Grief
  • Fear
  • Worries
  • Chronic health condition
  • Mental health disorder
  • Family history of anxiety or panic disorders
  • Alcohol and Drug Abuse

Differences In Treatment

Anxiety Attacks

Anxiety attacks are often treated as a symptom and can be treated with medication, cognitive-behavioral therapy, and hypnosis. Cognitive-behavioral therapy works in managing anxiety attacks and other mental health disorders and can help stop the gradual onset of the anxiety attack.

Panic Attacks

Panic attacks must be treated differently. Because they may be less frequent and can often not be predicted.

Therapy can be a helpful way to learn how to manage panic attacks. Therapy can help a person deal with a panic attack a little bit better if they are prepared in advance and know what to do.

What To Do If You Have An Attack

When you feel an attack coming on take slow deep breaths. Focus on your breathing and don’t allow it to quicken. It is also important to stay focus and not panic, try to control the situation with your thoughts and your breathing. Tell yourself the symptoms will pass, but you need to stay calm.

You can also use self-hypnosis relaxation techniques to help you get through the attack. Visualize a tranquil safe place and put all your negative thoughts and burn them in your mind.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

What does an anxiety attack feel like?

According to the latest version of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), symptoms of an anxiety attack or panic attack might include the following:

  • An intense fear, discomfort, or dread
  • Heart racing/palpitations or feeling like the heart is pounding
  • Feeeling Sick
  • Difficulty breathing, gasping for air, shortness of breath
  • Shaking uncontrolably, sweating trembling or hot flashes
  • Feeling faint, light headed with the room spinning.
  • Pins and needles, numbness or tingling
  • Dissociation and disconnection
  • Muscle Tension
  • Temperament Changes
  • Mood Swings
  • Tolerance Levels Changing
  • Anger Issues
  • Crying

The sudden, intense panic attack symptoms often mimic the fight or flight response; the brain may perceive a threat even when there isn’t one. I have had such attacks in the past and where I was either out of my comfort zone or was in danger, I started to panic.

Can an anxiety attack turn into a panic attack?

You’ve likely heard the terms anxiety attack and panic attack used interchangeably. Though similar and interconnected in many ways, anxiety attacks and panic attacks are not the same. 

Chronic anxiety can lead to anxiety attacks or states of heightened anxiety. Heightened anxiety leaves you feeling more vulnerable, so it’s not uncommon for panic attacks to evolve from this sort of emotional state.

How long do panic attacks last?

Panic attacks depend from person to person and generally last 5-20 minutes, although it has been known it can last hours or more.

How do you calm a panic attack?

There are several ways of dealing with panic disorder symptoms or a panic attack, these include deep breathing exercises, mind control with positive thoughts.

What works for one person may not work with another. Some people for instance may find that distracting themselves from their thoughts by talking with others or doing something creative is an effective way to calm themselves, whilst others might find it difficult to concentrate on anything other than their symptoms.

Controlling Panic Attacks.

  • Find something to distract yourself this could be reading a book, baking a cake or talking to someone.
  • Learn deep breathing techniques.
  • Practice meditation and muscle relaxation techniques.
  • Accept that you are having a panic attack and that, while the feeling is uncomforable the symptoms will not last forever.
  • Focus on positive thoughts.

What triggers a panic attack?

Panic attacks can be set off by specific situations, manifested through a triggered fear.

People who suffer from anxiety disorders, panic disorder, or other mental health conditions are more likely to experience panic attacks than others. 

What alternative help other than medication is available?

Panic attacks and chronic anxiety can be alleviated through meditation and hypnosis. However, if you’re dealing with the symptoms of panic disorder or panic attacks, it’s best to be medically reviewed and receive the diagnosis or treatment of a healthcare professional. 

What Natural Remedies are there for Anxiety?

  • Meditation
  • Hypnosis
  • Breathing exercises concentrating on inhalation/exhalation.
  • Muscle relaxation exercises
  • Distraction – Find something to do to take your mind off things. For me it is blogging or reading a book or watching a documentary.
  • Scripting positive thoughts
  • Keeping a journal, keeping track of thoughts and anxietythis helps to recognise the triggers. Part of conquering anxiety is understanding it!

What to drink to calm nerves?

Avoid caffeinated alcohol, coffee, or tea as sometimes caffeine can sometimes amplify the feelings and sensations you’d like to avoid. Drink herbal teas instead,

Drop us an email or leave a comment below and I will send you a herbal tea book for free.

If your symptoms are chronic or severe, it may be time to seek help.

Note From The Editor.

I have heard that lavender helps to relax you and aromatherapy can help with anxiety and stress. I am trying to be brave meeting my relative and leaving my comfort zone for the first time in one and half years and will update you on how it went on the 9th of this month.

I can feel my heart racing a bit but I am distracting myself with my work and also doing some self-hypnosis sessions on myself.

I have not cured myself of OCD yet and simply interacting with other human beings is going to be very daunting and a big ordeal for me considering I will be out for the majority of the day including going somewhere to eat. I am not sure how I will cope, to be honest, so wish me luck.

#anxiety #anxietyattack #panicattack #panicattacks #breathingexercises #meditation #hypnosis

Why Do People Assume or Presume?

Why Do People Assume or Presume?

Taking People For Granted, Assuming, Presuming and Mental Health.

People make assumptions as an efficient way to process the world. It is a shortcut to knowing the facts. As one Yale neurobiology professor explained, the brain’s vast neural network requires huge amounts of energy to keep it running: … One way our brain saves energy is by making assumptions. Making assumptions can ruin people’s lives.

Assume vs Presume

Presume is a verb that means to suppose, to take for granted, or to dare. Assume is a verb that means to suppose, to take for granted, to take upon, to do, or to undertake.

Assume and presume both mean “to take something for granted” or “to take something as true.” The difference between the words lies in the degree of confidence held by the speaker or writer. … ‘Presume‘ is the word to use if you’re making an informed guess based on reasonable evidence.

Therefore as an example I ask you some questions.

These are all hypothetical questions.

  1. Would you assume for example someone could find nearly $100 per month only by giving them one month’s notice for an increase in rent? Would you presume they could afford to find the $100?
  2. The second question would you assume someone who is self-employed to drop everything because you were arriving without even asking them if the date of your arrival was suitable for them? or would you presume they would just find the time because you snapped your fingers?
  3. The third question would you message a VIP and assume they have time to chat with you or that they will phone you when what you could say could have been written in an email that would take a minute or two to read, or would you expect that person to take time out of their busy schedule to hear you waffle on about something that could have been put in writing? or would you presume they would drop what they are doing to casually chat with you?
  4. Would you assume or presume that whoever you asked to call you or meet you could afford to do so? Would you assume or presume that their finances can meet the budget of an excursion for example or meeting up to go to a fancy restaurant? A self-employed person has more commitments than the average person, they have to pay the overheads of their business not just their own personal expenses.

These are all hypothetical questions that a disabled entrepreneur is faced with and I want to teach people to consider others before making rash decisions. It is unfair to put anyone on the spot regardless of their status, disability or situation.

Always discuss things and be very understanding and be respectful of someone’s wishes. Never judge based on a person’s choices.

Always find out the facts first and understand people’s circumstances before making plans or assumptions.

A self-employed person may not have the time to meet and maybe 100% dedicated to their work. Just because you have free time or work for someone else, there is a difference. If you work for someone else your wage is guaranteed, however, if you work for yourself your income is not”.

Do take off your rose-colored tinted glasses before making plans. There is a saying “put your brain in gear before putting your mouth in motion”.

People with Rosecolored tinted glasses tend to be optimistic and have a cheerful way of looking at life. … Someone who looks at things through rose-colored tinted glasses looks on the bright side, sees the glass half full, and looks for a silver lining in all things. So their way of thinking maybe if you lose work because of a casual meet-up to not to worry as another job will come along, having a go-lucky attitude. They also may think that life is too short to worry about finances and just go with the flow and live for the moment. Their excuses will always override your thinking and you cannot win.

NEVER ASSUME OR PRESUME ANYTHING!

  1. Do not assume or presume that people can talk to you when they are working 24/7.
  2. Do not assume or presume people can meet you even for five minutes if they have a busy schedule or a critical time path and manage other people’s businesses.
  3. Do not assume or presume people can pull money out of their a##es just because you are demanding. Think about what this will do to a person’s mental state of mind if you go on your high horse and be expectant.
  4. You would not expect, assume or presume the likes of say, someone like “Elon Musk” to drop everything for you so do not think you are so special that anyone will drop everything for you.
  5. Consider the other person’s circumstances before assuming or presuming they can travel. They may have health issues and may find it difficult to travel. Do not assume or presume that someone with a physical or mental disability will recover miraculously within a short space of time of your arrival, never assume or presume anything.
  6. Never assume or presume that within a month someone can find an extra $100 per month for a rent increase when they could have lost business because of the pandemic or their job.
  7. Never invite yourself to anyone’s home without asking them first if it is convenient, do not assume or presume that you turning up someone will drop everything for you.

It really rattles me when people are so narrow-minded and do not care about anything apart from themselves”.

People simply do not care: https://disabledentrepreneur.uk/why-people-do-not-care

I am venting my anger because not only do I have time wasters trying to waste my precious time, attempting me to do work but refusing to sign contracts, I also have those that think they can waste my precious money.

If you cannot support me, why bother talking to me? If you are just wanting to meet up to be nosey and judgemental, you can read about me online and do not have to see me? https://renataentrepreneur.com/irenata-my-sites

Do take people’s circumstances into consideration especially if they are running a business and have health issues.

If you want to see someone but they are not comfortable meeting you consider Facetime, Skype, Zoom, Teams to name a few, I personally do not have to see you in person.

Do not assume or presume that I for one will drop everything for you because you are arriving, you should never put anyone on the spot and expect to meet if you know they have health issues.

Do not assume or presume that my health issues will miraculously go away within a short space of time when I personally have battled my illness for 30 years. Do not put people on the spot and force them into a situation they do not want to be in.

Do not be selfish.

Do not assume or presume because you are turning up on a weekend that someone such as myself does not work weekends. Always find out the facts and give the other person plenty of time to make adjustments if at all possible and discuss a happy medium where both parties can agree to something, consider the person’s disabilities, and do not expect too much from that person if you care about them.

Ask in advance if that particular date is suitable for both parties concerned, do not assume or presume that they can take time off work, and be aware that may lose business because of your selfish, careless thinking.

Life lesson does not matter how old you are, if you want something from someone be prepared to compensate them for their time, service, and resources.

Never assume or presume people’s financial circumstances or their health and never assume or presume to take up people’s time.

Assumption can lead to resentment and animosity. Always communicate properly and understand that people that run small businesses may not have free time especially if they are trying to build their empires. Always consider other people’s circumstances first before being selfish.

There are so many self-centered people in this world, that simply only care about themselves but live a lie pretending they care about others, do not be one of them!

Note From the Editor.

Putting my health issues aside for a moment, I run several businesses www.irenata.com, and manage over 100 websites. I support startups that may not have the money to pay for a website upfront but want a helping hand to get them started. In return, they recommend me to other businesses. Just because I have over 100 websites they may not all be payable until the end of the trial period. Where I have to dedicate at least 2-4 hours of work a month to each website, so do the maths, that is 2-4 x hours per website x 100 websites = 200 – 400 hours per month divided by 4 weeks is 50 -100 hours a week which divided by 7 days is 7-14 hours per day without me doing anything else, so where have I find the time to meet up for a casual chit chat? I don’t and I can’t. I am not going to jeopardize my business for anyone.

This Is How My Critical Time Path Should Look Like below:

However, I cannot keep to my plan and most certainly cannot take time off work.

This is just an example CTP.

“So before assuming or presuming I can take time off work, take into consideration that I run several businesses of my own and manage other people’s businesses also”, so do the maths.

So before being judgemental and labeling me, I will protect my business with my life and will put it before anyone and anything else. I know there are people who are just watching and waiting for me to fail but I will not let that happen.

“Just because I have a disability does not make me crazy”.

If I choose not to waste my time walking around a park aimlessly for 10 minutes a day that’s my business. If I want fresh air I can step outside or if I want to do exercise I can do it in the comfort of my home.

I can manage my disabilities using my own methodology and do not like people trying to change my way of thinking unless I specifically ask them to.

If you have not walked in my shoes you have no right to make opinions, assumptions, or presumptions.

#assume #assuming #presume #presuming #takingforgranted

Coping With Life When You Are Disabled.

Copying With life When You Are Disabled.

I have this methology “if life gives you lemons, make lemonade”. I am not the type of person to whinge and moan, I just make the most of what I have and try to get on with it.

I always keep myself busy and set goals. However my physical and mental disabilities are obstacles that daily I have to get round.

My OCD is by far one of my prominent disabilities and have designed a quarantined cocoon area where only I have access to. This area allows me to be free of any anxieties that I would have in the normal environment. I have adopted this practice to save cleaning my whole home from top to bottom day in and day out. Believe me I used to clean from top to bottom every single day until I realised I was wasting valuable time doing something else.

Keeping myself busy does help to block out intrusive thoughts to a certain degree. I am the worlds worse for critising myself. I try to brain train to reason with myself that what I do is ridiculous and out of character to normal people, but it all is related to stress, anxiety and depression. Depending how stress I am under will depend how well my day will be. If I am super stressed, I find that I cannot concentrate and even do minuscule tasks.

My OCD is germ contamination related and I am even more conscious of my surrounding and the things that I touch. I dislike people visting me and visa versa. I prefer not to go out, hence I am not going out any time soon pandemic regulations or not.

I actually wrote an article on my other blog about germ awareness and cross contamination: https://marketingagency.cymrumarketing.com/2021/02/16/saliva-and-mail-cross-contamination-of-germs/

As for my other disabilities:

  • Cerebellar Atrophy (I lose my balance or grip and muddle my words up especially when I write, I also have mental blocks).
  • OCD (I am aware of germ cross contimination and and am careful what I touch).
  • Social Disconnection (I prefer my own company and not go out and socialise, although we can’t anyway but you get my drift).
  • PTSD (I have flashbacks of the physical and mental trauma I endured in the past and certain things trigger my depression).
  • Clinical Depression (This is related to past physical and mental trauma I endured, in which there are days where I go to a dark place).
  • Rheumatoid Arthritis (I cannot bend my knee, again from past physical trauma/abuse).
  • Dysphagia (I sometimes choke of food, I get a painful feeling followed by trouble swallowing and breathing and only when the food is dislodged does the feeling subside, gross I know but what can I do? I have been told I could have surgery but there is no gauarantee that it would work. I am not going to go under the knife for anything, I can tell you that for sure).
  • Epidural Analgesia (Chronic Back Pain, even bending down to feed the cat makes my back spasm, the same goes if I am standing for excessive length of time I have shooting pains from the small of my back to the nape of my neck. Simple taskes like taking out the rubbish or bringing in the grocery shopping has brought tears to my eyes in the past).

So yes I have good days and bad days but I do not dwell on my ailments and try to live the best way I can. I adapt to around my disabilities. Fortuantely for me I offer digital services so I can do 100% of my work online and do not have to venture out.

Stress and worry are contributing factors to my OCD, PTSD, Depression and Social Disconnection.

  • Getting headaches (I have regular headaches)
  • Having stomach cramps (I have a bad stomach most days, but that can be from drinking energy drinks to keep me awake).
  • Not being able to sleep (I find my medication helps me sleep but it takes a few hours for me to wind down, hence I watch a film or play a game, I also read books from time to time).
  • Feeling pains in your chest (I do not get them often but when I do it is scary as I have also experienced jaw ache and shooting pain down my left arm in the past). I have had an ecg scan done and the doctor said there was nothing wrong, yet the same doctor also prescribed antacid ‘Gaviscon’ to my daughter even though she was later diagnosed with MS after I admitted her into A&E.
  • Having constant worring (If I do not keep myself busy I do worry hence I try to keep my mind occupied all the time). Worrying only makes your health deteriorate and although life struggles can get in the way of your happiness, one needs to find a way to tackle the problem we are faced with, rather than sweep them under the carpet. Confronting your inner demons makes you stronger. Sometimes simply writing down your problems is the first step to dealing with whatever is on your mind. Talking to a friend or family member also helps but for me expessing my emotions in the form of a blog is theraputic in itself.
  • Having panic attacks (I only get these if I have to meet negative people). People that judge or critise, you know the people I am talking about or if I have a deadline in work or something that I have seen or heard that has triggered the onset of sheer panic. However for most part I am organised and know to how to avoid trigger warnings, so panic attacks are subdued.
  • Feeling shortness of breath, (I only get this if I cannot swallow due to my Dysphagia or at times when I have in the past been in distress, due to the trauma and abuse I endured).
  • Having mood swings with friends or family (I avoid socialising so no one knows my moods and no one can be on the tail end if I do have a bad day).
  • Finding it hard to feel happy (Continuously reassuring myself and staying positive that what I am doing will eventually change my life for the better, is enough to motivate me to get up and tackle every day tasks).

Although I was going to do a daily/weekly journal of my health, I am not able to do so at present as I have many projects I am working on and simply do not have the time, but I always try to strive to stay focused and optimistic that tomorrow will be a better day.

Obviously adopting a healthy lifestyle can help with coping with life struggles, such as:

  • Regular Exercise
  • Breathing Exercise
  • Meditation
  • Eating Healthily
  • Brain Training
  • Learning New Things
  • Staying Focused
  • Being Organised
  • Setting Goals
  • Time Management
  • Avoiding Negative People
  • Learning to Trust People
  • Motivation
  • Talking to Family and Friends About Your Troubles
  • Discussing your Problems with Professionals, Health, Finance, Relationships etc

Final Thoughts!

I am a disabled entrepreneur and I have created a business round my disabilities. The way I saw it when I first started out, I would not fit in or be accepted in a normal working enviroment and I am the most happiest I have ever been for a long time doing what I do and it works for me. So the way I see it is my disabilities are a blessing in disguise, as I would not be where I am today without them.

I avoid negative judgemental people especially if they have power trips (Trolls especially that have nothing better to do than try an bring a person down, these get immediately blocked).

As for me I will help anyone that genuinely needs my help. I am very good at analysing people and situations and I am very astute.

Stay safe, stay focused and stay motivated, nothing stays the same forever unless you let it…

What is Anxiety

What is Anxiety.

Believe it or not everyone suffers from Anxiety at some point in their lives. It is the most NORMAL psychological feeling anyone can have.

However, when a person regularly feels disproportionate levels of anxiety, it may be due to an underlying condition in which it becomes a mental health disorder.

Anxiety disorders are categorised through medical health diagnoses that can lead to excessive nervousness, fear, apprehension, and worry.

For example I am suffering with anxiety today, the lack of reassurance and with no support system in place to tell me everything will be ok is causing me to over think and worry.

I have no motivation and my concentration levels are easily broken by distracted intrusive thoughts. The persisting feeling of uncertainty and what my landlord is planning to do or not do is making me very ill right now.

Yes I know I can report my landlord for not doing his job properly but with that there is a domino effect, a consequence to an action and I do not want to risk loosing my home. I also do not want court battles etc as I have no energy. I need to stay focused which is the most important thing in my life, my business.

I do take medication but I only take it about an hour before I go to sleep as I do not want to feel zonked out and drowsy during the day.

I live on Monster White Ultra Energy Drinks to keep me awake.

Anxiety Mental Health disorders alter how a person processes thought and emotions. Mild anxiety might be unoticeable to an onlooker yet still might be unsettling to the sufferer, whilst severe anxiety may cause serious psychological problems where the sufferer may show obvious signs which affect their day-to-day living.

Anxiety disorders affects over 40 million people in the United States alone. In 2013, there were 8.2 million cases of anxiety in the UK. In England women are almost twice as likely to be diagnosed with anxiety disorders as to men (Men have difficulty asking for help). However there are many people that fall through the cracks and are left untreated. People who suffer with anxiety are more prone to turning to alcohol or substance abuse such as recreational drugs etc to relieve the build up of tension.

We first need to recognise the difference between normal feelings of anxiety and an anxiety disorder requiring medical attention.

When an sufferer faces potentially harmful or worrying triggers, these feelings of anxiety are not only normal but necessary for survival.

The feeling of anxiety causes a rush of adrenalin, a hormone and chemical messenger in the brain, which in turn triggers these anxious reactions in a process called the “fight-or-flight’ response. These alarms become noticeable in the form of a raised heartbeat (palpitations), sweating, and increased sensitivity to surroundings.

From as early on as stoneage we have adapted a protection mechanism whereby running from large animals and imminent danger caused us to have feelings of anxiety. As humans we have evolved and our surrounding have changed, we may not be in danger from the animal kingdom but more so from a concrete jungle. Anxieties now revolve around work, money, family life, health, and other pressing issues that demand a person’s attention without necessarily requiring the ‘fight-or-flight’ reaction.

People are more aware about the dangers surrounding them yet insecurities do play an active role that allows the sufferer to bring up barriers which is essential to our survival. Anxiety of being involved in a road traffic accident for example will make the sufferer be more vigilant and careful whilst driving.

The sufferer may develop physical symptoms, such as increased blood pressure and nausea and headaches.

The APA The American Psychological Association defines a person with anxiety disorder as “having recurring intrusive thoughts.” Once the sufferer experiences anxiety reaching this stage of a disorder, it can may well interfere with day to day ability to function properly and will need medical attention.

Symptoms

The symptoms of generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) will often include the following:

  • a feeling of restlessness or being “on-edge”
  • a feeling of uncontrollable worry
  • a feeling of insecurities
  • a feeling of agitation
  • a feeling of intense anger
  • a feeling of little or no patience and increased irritability
  • a feeling of little or no concentration
  • a problem sleeping, such as insomnia or the polar opposite of wanting to sleep all day
  • a feeling of hopelessness and that nothing matters any more
  • the lack of motivation
  • the lack of energy
  • stop taking care of themselves and may engage in risky behavior.
  • withdraw or isolate themselves from other people

Whilst these symptoms can manifest with the best of us not all of us can cope as well as we should.

If the symptoms persist and linger, it may be time to talk it over with your GP. No one should suffer in silence.

More Reading: https://www.apa.org/topics/holiday-stress

Final Thoughts.

Whilst I am suffering because of uncertainties in my life, I am grateful I have medication to help me sleep. I do not keep alcohol in my home as that is a recipe for disaster. I have learnt that although I am not an alcoholic and never have been, I do not trust myself when I am not in a controlled state. Sometimes drinking can even influence the anxiety to the extreme.

I would advise anyone experiencing axienty issues to consult their local doctor.

For me I will just have to confront my anxiety head on whenever that time will be and prepare myself for a worst case scenario. The prolonged feeling and uncertainty is the worst of not knowing what is going to happen.

I have only landlord and the pat testing electricians to blame for this, as my landlord should have had made sure the kitchen was safe to use, considering he had pat testing at the beginning part of the year. You would think that the company knew what they were doing but I can find faults in all the work they did and will doing my own report as evidence.

As a foot note from my own personal experience try to occupy your mind with something else other than what is troubling you. Watch a film or a documentary. Do an online course or read a book or take up a hobby like blogging, painting, photography or baking etc.

Although I am fortunate to own several blogs and in a way it is therapy for me, I still am battling my inner demons and can’t wait to confront the one person that is making me feel this way. I am not going to harrass him with endless text messages, he received a message and email from me so I have done my part. Seeing as he chose to ignore me it just says what type of human being he is aswell as what kind of landlord.

AMAZON BOOK STORE

Christmas Stress Due to Depression & OCD

Christmas Stress Due to Depression and OCD.

As most of you know I suffer from depression and OCD. I have good days and bad days and this last week have made my illnesses skyrocket.

Had the electricians that did Pat Testing the beginning part of the year done their jobs properly and seen that the cooker sockets were inside the hot zone that they should have corrected it.

However because they did not do this, this has created a domino effect when one thing happens after another due to the consequences of people’s actions. Now as you know my cooker arrived which I paid for (more fool me) seeing as I have never had a cooker change in the last 24 years of living at my rented residence, you would have thought the landlord would be happy. I told him I was buying a cooker months ago but conveniently he has forgotten.

So to add insult to injury it has been a week since the cooker was delivered and it is still not been installed.

I was told my landlord would turn up on Saturday then at near enough Midnight he text me to say he would be coming Monday or Tuesday (No Show) so I text him yesterday and asked if he was coming today this was a hours ago and so far he has ignored me.

You have to also know what type of landlord he is, I reported another fault in March of this year and he only had it fixed in December so you can imagine the pace he goes.

The chain reaction of events has caused me to go into severe depression and I am in a very dark place at the moment (This is now my landlord’s fault for making me feel like this as he was the last straw, the straw that broke the camels back to speak).

This is the main factor of my depression at the moment.

But there are additional factors whereby because I am disabled I have a disabled sticker on my wheelie refuse bin, so all the wheelie bins on the street were emptied apart from mine and I checked with the council and there was no reason why my bin was not emptied so my rubbish will pile up for another two weeks in which keeping rubbish in my home is against health and safety and I do not want to attract mice.

I have had problems with mice before and when my neighbor lived downstairs with her cats we had no mice but the moment she left we ended having mice problems.

I took it upon myself to allow my daughter to have a kitten who is now 1 yr 6 months years old it was supposed to be also good for her Multiple Sclerosis therapy and is an eco-friendly mice deterrent.

Now when my landlord came about 6 months ago just before the first lockdown to inspect the property he mentioned nothing about the cat but because I have essentially caused him to lose money because of this cooker installation he has now said he can smell cat urine on the entrance of the flat and up to our staircase and that he will need to buy a new carpet.

This is his way of scamming me as he will buy a cheap carpet and charge me through the roof for changing it. He will have to pay me back for the cooker in that case…..touché.

He scammed me once before by changing the dates of when the rent was due by asking for the rent two weeks after I paid my monthly rent and then moved the rent forward by a month essentially got 6 weeks rent in one month.

“Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me fool me three times I will publically shame you”, (although he fooled me once he won’t be fooling me again).

These are very challenging times for me and only I can get through this, but I still can blame people for making me feel the way I do.

To top it all I phoned the retailer yesterday to see where my refund was seeing as I had waited five working days and they said there was a ‘system error’ and I have to wait a further five working days.

If I treated my customers the way Blue Chip Companies treat theirs, I would most certainly not have any business left.

No consideration for people’s mental health.

Famous People Suffer From Mental Health.

It just shows even famous A-Listers have demons that they fight within their heads.

I wrote a post about why people do not care and now I can prove the point.

FINAL THOUGHTS!

For me to be treated by my landlord as a third-rate citizen is unforgivable and downright, ignorant and rude with no apology absolutely nothing.

If he was too ill he could have got his assistant to message me, rather than blank me altogether.

Out of courtesy, I would have if I were in his shoes been more transparent, just shows the difference in class of people we are.

My landlord has now caused me to sink into a deep well of depression”.

Because he owns the property he thinks he is better than me.

I on the other hand see it as cheap rent and somewhere to sleep.

I certainly would not call it home.

One day the tables will be turned and he will wish he treated me differently.

“Show respect and you will earn respect”

Sorry if I have ranted on about myself but I find writing my thoughts is a bit like therapy, I am releasing the tension and the anger and sharing it with you.

I am not bothering to contact my landlord again and will see how long it takes him to show his face.

As a paying tenant, I have a right to have a cooker and if I was trying to do him a favor I can essentially insist he re-imburses me including all the takeouts and perished food, not to mention PTSD and compensation for work I could essentially lose because I am too ill to work because of his antics and his cowboy contractors.

“On a scale of 1 feeling fine and 20 feelings really low I am 20 plus at the moment and am feeling extremely anxious as to my Landlords next move.

I personally do not know how he can face me again seeing he ruined my Christmas and I am subjected to takeouts every day at an average cost of £30 per day as I have no other means of cooking”.

https://www.jmw.co.uk/services-for-you/personal-injury/compensation-calculator/head-injury/post-traumatic-stress-disorder

Mental Health At Christmas – My Personal Experiences.

Mental Health At Christmas – My Personal Experiences.

For me personally speaking it is not my favourite time of year.

I miss my parents and my bother that passed away and Christmas is not Christmas anymore, I just want Christmas over and done with.

Not just that, I have a few personal problems at home and I get it I know I am not the only one going through things especially with another iminent lockdown on the horizon and businesses struggling to pay their bills.

How can I charge my clients if they are having financial issues? This becomes a catalytic reaction a so called domino effect.

I can underatand that I should be thankful that I have somewhere to sleep and have a roof over my head. However I alway live in fear for lots of different reasons, mainly the constant worry that certain people have an element control over me. I am sad that I cannot free myself no matter how hard I try. I am being told never give up so that is what I am doing, slowly plugging away until I hit the jackpot. It is hard work but I am determined to succeed no matter what. If only I could build my own Rose Island.

“In order to start a new life one needs a lot of money and if one does not have a support network it is difficult to make the change”.

However I am struggling at the moment with my mental health really badly at the moment especially since I had a delivery from ‘Argos’ on Thursday things have just escalated to the point I just want to cry, lock myself away, turn my phone off and not see or speak to anyone until the nightmare is over.

It does not help when ‘Argos’ do not put on their website anything about ‘Hot Zones’ prior to a consumer buying a cooker.

This has started a domino effect as I have had to get my landlord involved in which I really wanted to avoid doing that.

On top of all that because I have not been able to install my cooker all my food with ‘use by dates’ has perished. I have had to order takeouts for my family and at a cost of £30 per day and have not had a refund for my installation which I paid for upfront.

Who is going to compensate me for all the money I have wasted and am still wasting?

I have phoned Argos Customer Service and they have said I will get a refund and I should wait and trust them, but they said they do not send out confirmation emails. I have even emailed the CEO ‘Simon Roberts’ and messaged him on LinkedIn pointing him to a post I made about his website…..Obviously this has been ignored as I am a nobody to this person and insignificant.

I really cannot face work right now because of a series of events, which I do not want to go into, but today on a scale of 1 to 20 with 1 being happy and 20 being really bad, I can safetly say I have gone off the richter scale and I am 20 plus.

I cannot deal with the feeling of: Fear, Doubt, Anxiety and Worry and Intrusive Thoughts”.

These feeling I usually can supress but I am concerned as some people can be intimidating and I simply cannot handle that right now. I need reassurance that everything will be ok but there is no one backing my corner.

My problem, I lack a personal support system and have no one to turn to when I am at my lowest.

I am getting intrusive thoughts in my head and I am battling my demons.

I will see if I can sleep ok over the next few nights or not and if my anxiety and fear subsides or get worse, I have sleeping tablets but when I feel my heart pounding, it is hard to relax.

My heart is in my mouth right now pounding away and I am on the verge of crying.

There are consequences to peoples actions.

I wish something would go right for me right now, but everything I touch seems to go belly up and to pot. I am trying so hard for the situation not to defeat me.

Someone said to me recently “A problem halved is a problem solved”, in most case it is good to talk to someone else I totally agree, but if all that person is a lending of an ear and cannot give you advice as they don know how, then from my own personal experiences there is no point to even speak to them. You need someone who is professional, be it a counsellor, a GP or a Consultant. Who ever you turn to they must have some knowledge and are familiar with the problem you are experiencing and should never remind you about what is upsetting you. For me I miss my parents and brother so to be reminded about them not being here especially at Christmas is the wrong thing to do.

One needs to find a mentor or a person that can support you and give you solid helpful advice. You need to find a person that can be your rock.

For me right now, I really want to sob my heart out and cannot get to sleep. My mind is racing and I am getting heart palpitations. I feel physically sick.

Different Types of OCD

Different Types OF OCD.

About the Author – I want to first start by saying I have suffered with OCD for the best part of 30 years.

I first noticed I had issues whilst I was encountering a relationship breakdown which was very traumatic. The feeling of grief was just as debilitating as having someone pass away. You no longer can be with that person, see them or hear them.

However I would also like to say that my mother had OCD although it was undiagnosed and she refused to admit there was anything wrong with her.

Throughout my childhood for as long as I remember my mother would wash her hands to the extent she could empty a whole tank of hot water. She also would check the soles of the family shoes and any visitors shoes insisting the shoes had to be taken off before coming into the house. Our school uniforms had to be taken off in designated areas and all food packaging had to be cleaned before it could be safetly put away.

I was never allowed to invite friends over and if they called round we would just chat in the porch.

My mother was in denial and not knowing what OCD was at the time, I could not help her.

I could not relate until I was in my early 20’s and by that time my mother simply said I was talking nonsense and that she did not have a problem yet I clearly could see she did and so did I.

From talking to my extended family, I also found out my grandmother had OCD and so did my Uncle who would not sit down unless be put his hankerchief on a chair.

My OCD is related to germ contamination, mental contamination, rumination, intrusive thoughts and avoiding physical contact with anyone.

This has flactuated over the years and depending how trusting I was towards a person would determine my OCD levels.

Trusting.

If I do not trust someone now, I cannot physically touch them or touch anything that they have touched. I feel if I do, bad things will happen to me of which I have had my fair share of traumatic events.

Avoidance.

I rather avoid contact than risk something bad happening to me again.

I have been known to make several clothing changes in a day and had to wash myself with ‘Dettol Antiseptic Disinfectant’ before my intrusive thoughts subsided.

I find it hard communicating with the outside world, I am far happier sitting behind a computer screen than actually dealing with people face to face.

If things go well for me and I am less stressed I can venture out, but mostly I avoid people and social distancing is a God send to me as before I would get extremely frustrated when people were careless and walked into me or brushed past me and simply said “Sorry”. If I were a car and you bumped into me you would not be saying “Sorry”, instead you would be giving me your insurance details.

Since the Pandemic outbreak I have not left the house. I have everything delivered and can run my business remotely. I also have no visitors other than my daughters boyfriend who knows what he can and can’t do.

It is amazing how many people do suffer with OCD but do not talk about it and try to hide it. Even my daughters boyfriend has OCD and does not like touching things without having to wash his finger tips. He also has a tendency of checking to see if his car is locked several times before he is happy. I am not a therapist so I am not going to ask questions. It is up to him to seek medical help and not for me to interfere. If he wants my help I can simply advise.

There are Nineteen Characteristics of OCD.

  1. Checking (I have witness a chap a couple doors away from me going round his car serveral times checking to see if his doors are locked).
  2. Germ Contamination (This can be cleaning or disinfecting).
  3. Mental Contamination (The feeling of self worth when a person has been treated badily)
  4. Hoarding (My mothers friend is a hoarder and has suffered several traumatic events in her life). People who hoard find comfort surrounded by materialistic things which may be of no value to the outside world but is an asset to them.
  5. Ruminations (Rumination is the focused attention on the symptoms of one’s distress, and on its possible causes and consequences) This including avoidance go hand in hand.
  6. Intrusive Thoughts Intrusive Thoughts (Intrusive thoughts are thoughts that seem to become stuck in your mind) and everyone experiences them).
  7. Symmetry & Orderliness (having all the tins in the cupboard the right way round and in order and not having odd numbers or having everything lined up and in order).
  8. Self Harming (A compulsion to physically hurt oneself to stop the mental pain)
  9. Pulling Out Hair (Trichotillomania) My ex sister in law had a compulsion to pull her hair out when she was going through a divorce with my brother.
  10. Repetitive Questioning & Reassuance. (The need to make sure something or someone will be ok).
  11. Trigger (An obsessional intrusive thought triggered by seeing an object such as a knife that may harm someone).
  12. Avoidance (When I experience my forst traumatic event I avoided mentioning my ex boyfriend name).
  13. Ritual (compulsive behaviour (physical or mental)
  14. Homosexual OCD (A straight person that fears being gay)
  15. Paedophile OCD (Unwanted harmful or sexual thoughts about children).
  16. Religious OCD (Engaging in excessive prayer).
  17. Pure ‘O’ OCD (Hidden Mental Rituals, such as counting or saying or thinking a repeating the word over and over)
  18. Counting money, counting how many times you switched the light off or closed the door handle, turning the door handle.
  19. Numbers (A fixation of certain numbers)

More Links:

https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/intrusive-thoughts

OCD Is Not Only About Cleaning.

Shot of a woman doing her daily chores at home

On the contrary OCD is not just about cleaning it could be polar opposites. I cannot manage to keep a whole flat super germ free but can quarantine my bubble, my space so to speak and make sure it is not contaminated.

Over the years my OCD has been a combination of germ contamination, mental contamination, ruminations, rituals, reassurance, trigger, avoidance, intrusive thoughts, numbers and counting. I would either avoid saying the number 13 or count something 21 times, (I was born on the 13th ironically and once on my 21st birthday I placed a £1.00 bet on the roulette table and won £21.00).

I occassionaly have had irrational thoughts and try to rationalise with myself that my thoughts are just that, stupid thoughts and totally absurd.

I have managed to cope with my OCD and having everything under control. Obviously it is not ideal but life is not perfect. “If you are dealt lemons, make lemonade”

I have tried therapy in the past and find it difficult to go over the same old things over and over again I would much rather forget.

Funnily enough I spoke to my mothers friend the other day and where I tried to be support for her as she had breast cancer and had her breast removed, I found it more and more difficult to phone her every week because without fail she would mention my ex which I want to forget but she won’t let me. She is old she is in her 80s so she forgets things as I have noticed each time I give her my telephone numberm so for me to say please do not mention my ex again would simply go over her head.

I have also tried cognitive therapy forcing you to touch something and resisting you from washing your hands. This did not work for me as I have to be in the right state of mind for it to work.

Give me £1M to start my life over again and I will see if my OCD gets better 🤔. This could be a social experiment which I could write if changing ones life for the better helps to change ones mental state.

Like I said I am no expert but I have lived with this disability for a number of years and have witnessed people’s behaviour in terms of their own OCD, aswell as reactions when you say you have OCD.

People still think mental illness as taboo and look at you as if you are ‘CRAZY’.

I most certainly do not belong in an asylum but just have a defense mechanism to protect myself from harm when I am threatened or feel insecure.

The way I see it I can mock myself but no one has the right to mock me.

I wish I could live a normal life without worry or stress and brain wash all the bad things that have ever happened to me away. But the chance of that happening are slim as I will always be reminded about my parents and bother passing away aswell as the abusive relationship and other bad incidents that happened to me over the years.

Trigger.

I still have episodes where I look at something and it brings back bad memories. Looking at photographs of people that have passed away and the feeling of sadness and emptyness or seeing something that was used to harm me. My home is full of very expensive memories that I cannot simply get rid of because of their materialistic value and have been damaged in some way. As an example looking at the bristles of a kitchen broom today brought memories flooding back.

I try my best to block out things and put them away where I cannot see them.

My home is full of bad memories which I would rather forget.

One day I hope to put the past behind me and start a new life somewhere else in a happier environment and I know what is holding me back, hence my plan will not happen overnight.

All I can do is try my hardest to move on and make a negative into a positive.

What Causes OCD.

There are many theories what causes OCD.

Scientists however have not been able to identify a definitive cause for why a person develops  Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD).

The potential causes of OCD can involve one of or a combination of either; neurobiological, genetic (my mother and my grandmother), learned behaviours (seeing my mother perform her rituals although I do not copy any), pregnancy, environmental factors or specific events that trigger the disorder in a specific individual at a particular point in time.

For me it have been a catalyst of a series of traumatic events that have caused me to cocoon myself, although cereabellar atrophy is also linked to OCD which I was diagnosed with about 11 years ago, which makes no sense as I have had OCD for about 30 years now.

The way I see it although there may be other factors that have caused me to have OCD including it being hereditory, I stongly believe PTSD is a leading source to why I have OCD and how people have treated me in the past that has made me the person I am today. Obviously some of the trauma is the loss of my parents and my brother but I also was subjected to physical and mental abuse. So my story is colourful to say the least.

Moving Forward.

I am passionate about the cause becasue I have been a life long sufferer and always keep up to date with ways to alleviate the symptoms aswell as helping others with motivation and inspiration, at the same time as helping myself.

OCD Is An Invisible Disability.

OCD Is An Invisible Disability and if you ask anyone who has got OCD would they want to trade for a normal life you will find everyone would agree including myself that OCD can be a living hell and would want the nightmare to end.

People who do not understand about OCD may be judgemental or may even mock a person. It is why its is so important to not let peoples opinions influence your way of thinking. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and at the end of the day it is their opinion not yours. It is your opinion that matters the most not someone elses.

One needs to be in right frame of mind to make changes to ones life and also to conquer OCD.

You have to retrain your brain that what happened, happened and that there is nothing you can do about it apart from move on.

You need to set goals and take each day as it comes.

Take each day day by day and make small steps, behavioural therapy teaches you that anyway.

OCD changes with our lives.

Once we find we are happy within ourselves, confident and secure our OCD will eventually subside. In the mean time talk with you GP about what types of medication they can prescribe to make the journey a bit easier.

For me one thing I have noticed is by experssing my thoughts in my online journal, I somehow can get whatever is ailing me at the time off my chest, so although I am not physically speaking with anyone, my readers who find value in the content I write will appreciate my comments.

You too can have your own journal it does not have to be online but a diary where you can monitor your good days and your bad and even compare your days with your GP or consultant.

For me my therapy is writing, it is like letting go of a demon. Obviously I have brainwashed myself that I have to perform things in a certain way otherwise it will play on my mind but can honestly say I do try to resist my compulsive urges as much as I can. It does not work all the time as I find I do cave in, but I cannot be criticised for not trying.

I know once I am in my happier place my OCD will be a thing of the past but its only been 30 years later that I have actually started to do something about it, before I was not in a position to but now I have an opportunity to learn, teach and heal.

Once you can admit to yourself what your insecurities are you are one step closer to battling your illness.

Fear.

For me it is a constant battle but I know where I am going with this and I may never be completly cured but once I am in a happier place I now I will be on the road to recovery.

At the moment I prefer to be a recluse and not allow anyone to enter my world. I am not ready to make that step especially with the FEAR Coronavirus Covid-19 Pandemic and I do not want to contract the virus as it could potentially kill my daughter who has a very low immune system, secondly she will not be able to even take the vaccine as it is a live virus including myself.

I Am Staying In My Bubble, For the Forseeable Future!

Recommended Reading & Serotonin Chocolate Shop:

You Can Also Get a Boost of Serotonin In Chocolate.

Chocolate is linked to the neurotransmitter serotonin through a key compound that can be isolated from the chocolate bar itself: Tryptophan. Tryptophan is an amino acid found in small quantities in chocolate and is also the precursor for Serotonin.

Mental Health Amongst Entrepreneurs

Mental Health Amogst Entrepreneurs.

Starting a business can be stressful, no one said it would be easy. One has to plan ahead and manage finances so that you can live. Nothing happens overnight, there has to be a lot of planning to lift your business to the next level and none if it comes without stress.

According to Michael A. Freeman a researcher from the University of San Francisco states that entrepreneurs are twice as likely to develop depression and three times more likely to engage in substance use and abuse than the general population.

Entrepreneurship is often looked up to as a status symbol that the individual has found the courage to be independant and in control of his/her own careers. Entrepreneurs are also admired for their creativity and initiative. Yet their personal struggles are often not acknowledged because people think being an entrepreneur you are an automatic success which sometimes can be further from the truth. Entrepreneurship comes with challenges in which can add unnecessary stress.

Entrepreneurs tend to be seen as high achievers, driven and motivated. However having these fine qualities does come with some disadvantages. Most entrepreneurs are perfectionists and tend to put aside their personal needs over the needs of their business sometimes foregoing personal family outings or general socialising events in the name of making their business a success. Many marriages have fallen apart because of the entrepreneurs protecting their business with the business coming first place and the marriage coming last.

Because being an entrepreneur nothing is guaranteed there is a lot of scope for failure and uncertainties especially if they are not well established and cannot guarantee a steady income. These uncertainties increase proneness to anxiety disorders, depression, substance use/abuse, and eating disorders.

How many entrepreneurs you know are heavy drinkers?

Reasons entrepreneurs get depressed include:

1). History of Anxiety and Depression

2). Lack of Motivation and Inspiration

2). Feeling Unsuccessful and Fear of Failure

3). Problems maintaining control of your business, perhalps lack of funds or problems with staff or late paying customers.

4). Large numbers of investor rejections

5). Stress and long working hours leading to burnout

6). Being sabotaged by partners

7). Problems with Staff or Recruitment

8). Struggles gaining and maintaining traction

9). Problems with Branding

10). Problems with Marketing

11). Financial Difficulties

12). Lack of Support from your martital partner

13) Feeling Lonely

14) Suffering From othe Mental Health Disorders

15). Lack of Sleep

Growing your business does not come without setbacks, such as securing leads, losing clients, customers disputes or not seeing eye to eye with your business partner(s). It could also be increased competition, staffing problems, whilst struggling to pay the wages and having enough money to pay yourself. Psychiatrist and former entrepreneur Michael A. Freeman, who researches mental health and entrepreneurship says that being an entrepreneur can be very traumatic and can lead to mental health issues.

If you already have mental health problems this can increase your anxieties. No one wants to admit to their vulnerabilities, but the more support there is the more we can be open about our struggles. It is no good bottling it all up inside. Business Men and Women have practiced what is called by social psychiatrists ‘impression management’, also known as “fake it till you make it.” We should never pretend to be something we are not, but at the same time you do not want the whole world knowing your problems as this can be damaging to your business. However the more transparent you are and even being an advocate for mental health, people will quickly start to trust you.

There are also organisations that can allow you to stay anomymous. if you are struggling to find somone to talk to you can reach out here to us or contact the following organisations:

Support Links.

MENTAL HEALTH LINKS

What is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

What is Anxiety

What is Stress

What is Depression

Suicide Healthline

SAMARITANS.org

OCDUK.org

MIND.org.uk

YoungMinds.org.uk

PHYSICAL HEALTH USEFUL LINKS

https://www.who.int/health-topics/disability#tab=tab_1

GOVERNMENT LINKS

https://www.gov.uk/browse/disabilities

BUSINESS RESOURCES FOR PEOPLE WITH DISABILITIES

https://www.aabrs.com/business-resources-for-people-with-disabilities/

Showing Your Success.

Some people want to show the world instantaneously how successful they are before actually being successful so they max out their loans and cards to the hilt and drive flashy cars and wear high end designer clothes just to look the part and fake their image.

Being not true to yourself will eventually catch up with you. Do not pretend to be someone your not, people will soon see when cracks start to appear.

Honesty is the Best Policy.

If you are having finacial difficulties and for example you can not pay bonuses tell your staff and give them a reason why, never leave things to the last minute. If you tell your staff in advance they are more likely to be more understanding. Always be transparent.

You do not have to air your dirty laundry in public but can adapt a monthly or weekly mental health event where people can network and get support. Simply be listening to other peoples problems and relating to similarities can be make people think they are not alone with their struggles.

We need to find a way where we can express our problems without it having a detrimental effect on our business or our health.

Mental Health is still classed as taboo and people find it hard to talk about what they are going through.

No one should feel they are all alone and there is no one that could possibly undersatnd their struggles as did the successful entrepreneurs that came to their demise even though they seemed to be in control, one being ‘Ilya Zhitomirskiy’ founder of Diaspora, a social networking site and the other ‘Jody Sherman’ founder of the e-commerce site Ecomo. The list continues with Fashion Designers ‘Alexander McQueen’, ‘Kate Spade’ and A-List Actors such as ‘Robin Williams’ to name just a few.

Mental Health statistics show according to research done by the National Institute of Mental Health that an astonishing 49% of entrepreneurs are directly effected and 32 % are indirectly affected by mental health problems compared to just 48% of non entrepreneurs. The statistics are far greater because the pressure of success.

The study showed that 23% of entrepreneurs are affected because some family members may be experiencing mental health issues.

The biggest challenges entrepreneurs have, especially with their mental health is asking for help. Not only so but working all the hours God sends can be very lonely. It is hard to juggle a home life with a entrepreneurial life, often making sacrifices that can cause our personal relationships to crumble.

Furthermore when you see companies securing multi million dollar deals and you are bearly getting by, the feeling can sometimes be deflating. But one has to think that even these companies started out most probaby somewhere just like you and with staying focused and perserverance they have managed to climb the ladder. However even companies that are a success struggle with being No1 and continue to push themselves to perfectionism.

Good Leadership.

It is all about being honest and addressing the problems you have. By being in denial and sweeping your problems under the carpet won’t make your problems go away. If you are a successful business the pressure to maintain the status can be even far greater than starting out. There are organisation you can reach out to for help.

You do not have to announce to the world you have mental health issues but there is always someone you can talk to. If it is problem solving there is tonnes of information on the internet and companies that do business consulting. You could even have monthly employee mental health days where you get someone to talk about mental health in general. Not only will it be therapy for you it will also help your staff dealing with problems themselves. Your employees will see you are a compassionate leader which will gain you a lot of respect.

Retraining Your Brain.

Outsmarting your way of thinking can set you on the road ot recovery.

Practice the following Steps:

  1. Setup an action plan. Do your research and but your actions into motion. Set up a business plan, speak with people in your industry, speak to your business bank manager who can put you in touch with people. Consider Business Consultants and do networking.
  2. Setup a Support Network. Find people that will support you from friends, family, coaches and mentors. There are business social media platforms that you can exapnd your network and engage with like minded people.
  3. Allocate some quality time (me time). Take time off to reflect and relax so that when you return you are set to go. Even having a day off or even an afternoon off is better than nothing at all. In your free time do nothingat all or doing sometime you love.
  4. Have a dream board. Stick down all the goals you want to acheive and give yourself a deadline. Every day for five minutes before you start work look at your dream board and focus on why you are about to start the day and that you are one day closer to acheiving your dream. You could have a board you stick on your office wall or have one on your desktop home screen or in your diary (I keep one in my diary and it goes evrywhere with me).
  5. Keep a journal. Write down all your dreams and aspirations and take a daily note of your highs and your lows. (For me blogging is my therapy).
  6. Maintain a Good Diet. We are what we eat. Eating unhealthily will cause damage to our bodies. Treat your body like your office. You don’t store junk in your office so do not fill your body with junk food. Take vitamin supplements and trat your body like a temple.
  7. Maintain a Level of Excercise. Even if you find it difficult leaving your home, do some workouts at home. There are pleanty of YouTube videos you can adapt your exercise routine to.
  8. Reward Yourself. At the end of the week or month once you reach your daily or weekly goals give yourself a pat on the back and trat yourself. You don’t need to go overboard but give yourself something that will motivate you to complete another task, as in the suggestions below if your a woman.
  9. Help Others. By helping others you are also helping yourself. If you focus only on yourself you will fall into a spiral of loneliness and depression but if you help others and put your worries aside you ar not longer making yourself the centre spot. Remember there is always someone out there you can help.
  10. Consider Getting Medical Advice. The first port of call is your GP. If your are constantly worrying and are feeling anxious and depressed visit your GP who can prescribe you some antidepressants and something to help you sleep.

Final Thoughts.

“There is a solution to every problem and you are never alone as there is always someone that you can talk to. If you can not face speaking to someone directly over the phone you can send an email or contact form”.

Do also visit the Useful Links Page.

RECOMMENDATIONS.

Further Reading:

https://www.forbes.com/sites/danmurrayserter/2020/10/04/why-entrepreneurs-need-to-talk-about-their-mental-health/?sh=2de354b137d0

https://www.inc.com/magazine/201309/jessica-bruder/psychological-price-of-entrepreneurship.html

https://medium.com/amp/p/a0d62a3ed389

Weak Bladder Problems We Don’t Talk About.

Things We Don’t talk About Because Its Too Embarrassing.

Weak Bladder Problems, Things We Don’t talk About Because Its Too Embarrassing.

Control Your Bladder Before It Controls You.

As we get older things happen to our bodies that sometimes are very embarrassing to talk about, especially to our friends and our families. It is not always about ones age that can cause us to have weak bladders it could be a number of things and half the female population will experience urinary incontinence at some point in their lives. Stastistics have shown that women are 5 times more likelier to develop bladder problems than men and 1 if 5 women will seek help and go to their GP’s. The age range is about 6% of women between 15 to 44 experience incontinence issues whilst the statistics show 10% of men over 65 to have urinary incontinence to some degree. Studies have shown that in the UK “major faecal incontinence” affects 1.4% of the general population over 40 years old.

However experiencing public humiliation can be avoided if you train your bladder. Have you been in a situation you have coughed or laughed and trickled (now you know where the term comes from “I nearly peed myself laughing” comes from).

Or have had to make a mad dash to the toilet rugby tackling people along the way. What ever the scenario, there are things that you can do to make your life a little less embarrassing without leaving tell tale wet patches around.

We can mock all we want but it is no laughing matter especially when it happens to the best of us. We are human after all.

The causes of embarrasiing problems include weak bladder which I will focus on today but there are other symptoms to do with mental health that people have a hard time talking about, which I will address in another post.

Weak bladder can be caused by the following:

  1. Drinking too much alcohol or caffeine (tea/coffee) or energy drinks. (I am guilty of this).
  2. Not drinking enough fluids such as water – this can cause strong, concentrated urine to collect in your bladder, which can irritate the bladder and cause symptoms of overactivity and cystisis.
  3. If you are not going regularly for a No2 and you find your are constipated.
  4. Infections and underling conditions affecting the lower urinary tract (urethra and bladder) – such as urinary tract infections (UTIs) or tumours in the bladder.
  5. Neurological conditions such as Multiple Sclerosis or Parkinsons Disease.
  6. Natural Childbith where your pelvic floor may be weak.
  7. Certain medicines such as angiotensin converting enzyme (ACE) inhibitors, diuretic, antidepressants, hormone replacement therapy (HRT), sedatives. (My medications can also be a factor of me having a weak bladder)
  8. Increased pressure on your tummy – for example, being heavily pregnant or over weight. (I am definitely overweight as working from home limits how much excersise I do which at the moment is virtually non existent, plus the fact I am social distancing myself from everyone because of my OCD beliefs and cross contamination).
  9. Damage to the bladder or nearby area during surgery – such as the removal of the womb (hysterectomy), or removal of the prostate gland.
  10. Connective tissue disorders such as Ehlers-Danlos syndrome.
  11. Having a poor diet eating, spicy or acidic foods.
  12. Smoking.

The best way to combat incontinence is to change our lifestyles and take better care of our bodies, starting with perlvic floor exercises and changing our diets. But that means discipline as nothing happens overnight.

We can also do some jogging either out and about or on a tread mill and aerobics, with strengthening exercise, such as pilates. There are plenty YouTube Videos you can find and adapt. Also avoid lifting heavy things as this will effect your pelvic floor and add further uneccessary strain.

There are non surgical aids one can use to counteract a weak bladder from incontinece pads to supplements.

Absorbent products, such as pants, pads or pany liners can save you from some embarrassing moments when you simply cannot control your bladder long enough to get to the bathroom or handheld urinals, which are not ideal especially if you are caught out and about, like where can you discretly have a pee, you can’t?, unless you are maybe in you car or out on some country road where you could always take advantage of the bushes.

My brother said he once was caught short on the motorway in non moving traffic and was forced to pee in a coke bottle. Not so easy for women though. My mother had to make service pit stops at every junction when she used to go on longer journeys. For me my bladder gives me no warning at all and I have to do my wriggle dance long enough to run to the toilet which happens to be like clockwork every two hours hence I never get a full eight hours beauty sleep. Its not as if I can time it one minute im ok and the next minute I am desperate.

More Information about Urinary Incontinence please visit: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/urinary-incontinence/causes/

I have recommended some incontinence supplements and aids below:

Final Thoughts.

Regardless of your age you should never be too embarrassed to say that you have a bladder problem and if you cannot manage it yourself you may need to get some medical advice and see what options are available for you.

Lack of Motivation.

Lack of Motivation.

Lack of Motivation.

I do not know about you but I have days sometimes where I feel so deflated. I was talking about this with my daughter who said some days she feels she does not want to get out of bed. Or she wants to go to the Bahamas on her own. Not all of us can go to the Bahamas at a drop of a hat and some of us have obligations and commitments, so although the idea sounds appealing I am staying put for the time being.

Today is one of those days, I feel I just want to waste my time watching Amazon Prime Videos all day.

I do not drink alcohol, only on social occasions, and this year there is nothing social about it. My OCD will not permit me to go to Pubs which are open in Wales. It’s unfortunate that our neighbor England is on lockdown again, but it is what it is and has to be done.

This got me thinking as I am very active on LinkedIn and a top recruiting firm in the UK, the CEO announced he was feeling not so motivated. He also said he was living alone which got me thinking how many other people are in the same boat and are contemplating their navels.

Life is full of obstacles and we need to find ways to train our brains that whatever is happening to us is just temporary and we have the power to change the situation.

If you have recently lost your job and are struggling to find work, what you do is create a job and be your own boss.

You must promote yourself and your brand, no one will know you exist unless you tell them.

If you have a craft and are creative put your creativity online.

How about setting up your own eCommerce store and start dropshipping. With the current situation, we are in, most people shop online.

Start a blog and do affiliate marketing. You need to create your blog first though before being approved for these programs.

Whatever is going on with your life start being creative and start writing things down including all the pros and cons.

Start a dream board and focus on your goals.

Meditate and manifest your dream into reality.

My lack of motivation would disappoint my readers because if I did not write a post or two I would be letting people down.

I have gone too far now to give up.

I manage my client’s blogs as well as my own so I have plenty of work to keep me busy.

But some days I feel sad because everything I do is not happening fast enough my goals seem so distant, but I know if I persevere I will get there in the end.

Motivation is the process that makes us initiates an action, whether it is getting up to go to the kitchen to researching and gaining knowledge online.

Our time is precious and should not be wasted. By learning something new, we are gaining knowledge that is more valuable than money or gold.

Motivation is defined by biological, emotional, social, and cognitive factors that activate our behavior.

Types of Motivation

There are two different types of motivation that are frequently described as being either extrinsic or intrinsic:

Extrinsic motivations are those that arise from outside our control and may involve rewards such as trophies, money, social recognition, or praise.

Intrinsic motivations are motivations that are from someone doing something off their own back like playing a game or completing a crossword puzzle purely for the personal gratification of problem-solving.

Persistance.

When you set goals unless you follow them through you will not succeed. You need to stay focused and need to be persistent.

Impact

Simply having the desire to accomplish something is not always enough. In order to achieve such a goal requires you to follow it through and not give up, the ability to persist through obstacles, and endurance to keep going in spite of difficulties.

There are three major factors to motivation: activation, persistence, and intensity.

Activation involves the decision to start a specific task.

Persistence is the persisting effort towards a goal even though there may be obstacles.

Intensity is the ability to stay focused and concentrate into pursuing a goal.

You need to remember when you set your goals daily that you reward yourself for completing the task. You could do this at the end of the day, week or month. If you do not know how to reward yourself pay yourself some money or treat yourself to something. By paying yourself and putting it into a separate bank account you will be surprised how much money you make if you are persistent.

My downfall ten years ago as I did not know how to train my brain and was reckless with money. I was spiraling out of control was not focused on my life and was living in cloud cuckoo land. I had no goals and felt my life had ended. It is only in the last five years I have done a lot of souls searching and gained a lot of knowledge online and it’s as if the starter gun had been triggered because there is no stopping me now other than my mental health issues. But if I keep myself busy I have less time to think and less time to feel sorry for myself.

As for my financial habits, I have now found a way to budget my money for everything and do not spend more than I need to. There are plenty of money budget tools online but I use a simple word table and make it colorful. You could also do an excel spreadsheet.

So by doing this blog I am not just helping my readers I am also helping myself.

Tips

Everyone experience fluctuations in their motivation and willpower.

Sometimes we may feel highly driven and other times we may feel listless or unsure of what we want or how to achieve it.

If you feel low and simply have no energy, there are steps you can take that will keep you moving forward.

Some things you can do include:

  1. Take baby steps, just so one thing as I have done today with this post.
  2. If you have a big project that is too overwhelming, break it up into smaller projects.
  3. Have plenty of exercise and sleep.
  4. Change your diet and eat healthily
  5. Find Mentors.
  6. Do some networking.
  7. Remind yourself about your achievements in the past and where your strengths lie.
  8. If there is something worrying you write it down do some research on how to combat it.
  9. Talk to a friend or family member or on a group or forum, anywhere where someone is willing to listen and give advice.
  10. Take a bit of time out to do something else, knowing you always have your goal to come back to.
  11. Do not procrastinate, you have to believe in yourself even sometimes when no one else does.
  12. Create a Dream Board of all the goals you want to achieve in the next 5 years to 10 years.
  13. Meditate and envisage your goals manifesting.
  14. Reward yourself.
  15. Pamper yourself or if your a guy groom yourself.

Final Thoughts.

Do little things to make your life better and eventually you will make your confidence grow. Sometimes we have to start with ourselves and do a bit of soul searching and learn to love ourselves before we can find the power to prosper.

A seedling needs to be cared for on a daily basis before it gows into an oak tree!

« Older posts